Welcome to Poly Land!
There’s a lot of content, and it’s easy to get lost, but we’re always here to help you find your way.
Poly Land is a daily blog (since September 2016) about relationships, psychology, kink, and general self improvement. Sure, we lean towards open, consensual relationships, but the topics discussed apply to multiple areas of life.
Here’s a sampling of articles that might help you from our Poly 101 Category
Other categories can be found in the menus to the right and bottom
Polyamory (n.) — The practice of participating simultaneously in more than one serious romantic or sexual relationship with the knowledge and consent of all partners
Opening Up an Existing Relationship
- 5 Imbalances Newly Polyamorous Couples Face – What imbalances in a relationship are fine when monogamous, but may cause trouble in an open relationship
- Best Practices for Negotiating Polyamorous Relationship Agreements – An overview of things to keep in mind when deciding what you want your relationships to look like
- What’s Mono/Poly?: A Basic Introduction – A basic introduction to when one partner is polyamorous, and the other isn’t.
- Poly Road Testing for Responsible Travelers – So You Want to Open Your Relationship, What Next?
- 5 Steps to Feeling Safe and Secure in Polyamory — and Beyond! – Feeling secure in your relationships, not just for polyamorous folks.
- The Switcheroo: When Openers Become Benchwarmers – A piece dispelling some common misconceptions about polyamory
Tools for Polyamory
- How to Meet Polyamorous People
- 9 Steps for Having an Accountability Talk with a Partner When Things Go Wrong
- Polyamory Toolbox: The Good Roommate Standard – Finding the right social model for treating your partners kindly
- Help, I Don’t Like My Metamour! – What to Do When You Don’t Like Who Your Partner Dates
- Polyamory Toolbox: Wearing the Friend Hat
- PQ 3.2 – Polyamory and Boundaries, First Degree, Second Degree and Beyond
- Ask Page: My Partner Just Asked Me for STI Testing, Am I Being Slut Shamed?
- Help! I Need a Better Way to Refer to the People in My Love Life – a post about labels
- How to Be Jealous in a Productive Way
- 6 Other Things Jealousy Can Mean – Because many other things masquerade as jealousy
- 6 Things Jealousy Doesn’t Mean – When trying to understand something better, it can be helpful to have a firm grasp not only of what it *is* but also what it *isn’t.*
- Why Don’t You Shave Your Legs for Me Anymore? – Taking extra pains with a new partner can mean you don’t trust them yet, not that you care about them more.
- Please Be Jealous – The worst thing isn’t jealousy. It’s being ashamed of it.
- Jealousy Is Not an Emotion: A Systems Approach
- PQ 8.5 – But What About the Flattering Jealousy?
- Jealousy Is a Check Engine Light – Jealousy is a very strong emotional signal — but it’s not a very specific one.
- Dealing with Your Own Jealousy Is a Lot Like Caring for a Crying Baby
- Poly Debriefing #1: Compersion – Compersion is a state of empathetic happiness and joy experienced when an individual’s current or former romantic partner experiences happiness and joy through an outside source, including, but not limited to, another romantic interest.
- Cultivating Compersion Can Be a Helpful Distraction from the Pain of Tackling Jealousy and Insecurity – ways to cultivate compersion and why doing so is helpful
- Compersion IS Empathy: Aiming for Joy – If you can consider a person’s success also your success, then it’s a lot easier to feel happy for someone.
- Building Others Up: Attacking Zero Sum Thinking at Its Source