What Couples’ Privilege Is & How to Navigate It
August 11, 2023
If you’ve been polyamorous for any length of time, you’ve undoubtedly seen couples’ privilege in action. I’ve found in my own travels that like many
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6 Reasons Why Polyamorous People Are Always Talking About Polyamory
May 26, 2023
There are lots of reasons why it’s important for polyamorous people to talk about polyamory. Here are 6 of the most common.
5 Reasons Why Polyamory Is Simply Awesome
May 18, 2023
Here are 5 reasons why polyamory is simply awesome.
Is Polyamory Right for You? 5 Questions to Help You Know
May 10, 2023
Is polyamory right for you? Here’s how to know.
How to Tell Your Friends and Family You’re Polyamorous
May 9, 2023
Coming out as polyamorous to friends and family can be a daunting task. Here are 6 quick tips on how to approach the conversation.
The Newest Book in a Polyamorous Urban Fantasy Series Is Out!
December 1, 2022
Hey folks, This is just a quick post to let you know that The Ecumenopolis, the fourth book in the Psychic State series is out!
Which World Am I In Again?
July 25, 2022
I never planned for this spring and summer to be so difficult. But does anyone ever? It isn’t as though people pencil in traumas on their calendars or dutifully schedule major losses.
You Shouldn’t Have to Trick Someone Into Dating You
June 22, 2022
The less time you spend on relationships that shouldn’t happen, the more time you have to discover and explore the ones that should.
Working On Yourself Is a Thankless Job
June 17, 2022
Some people need you sick to find you useful and want you around.
The Difference Between Not Being Upset and Wanting to Not Be Upset
June 15, 2022
There was a difference between not being upset and wanting to not be upset. And I had been conflating the two.
Aw heck.
It Can Be Lonely to Go Off Autopilot But Worth It
June 13, 2022
Sometimes it seems like it’d be better to go on autopilot. Easier certainly. And a heck of a lot less lonely than questioning the status quo or forcing myself out of my comfort zone.
I Find It Easy to Fall for People Who Make Me Feel Better About Myself
June 8, 2022
Figuring out what romantic relationships and close friendships I want to have has also involved figuring out what aspects of myself I want to feel better about and which ones I want to work on.
How Long Will It Be Until I Forget?
June 6, 2022
My mother said once that I have a hard time getting over things because I have a good memory. “If you could only just forget, you’d feel better. Forgetting helps us let go of the pain.”
Learning to See an Imperfect Person Perfectly
June 3, 2022
“We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.”
-Sam Keen
It’s Tough to Stay in the Moment & Yet Plan for the Future
June 1, 2022
It’s tough to stay in the moment and yet plan for the future.
Give Your Suffering Friends Time to Heal
May 27, 2022
The biggest gift we can give someone who is suffering is just holding space and being there for them.
You’re Great When Things Don’t Go as Planned & That’s Amazing
May 25, 2022
All week I’ve looked forward to this, and now it’s cancelled. It’s such a small thing, but I’m far more disappointed than I want to be.
“How Are You Doing?” Hits Differently When You’re Grieving
May 23, 2022
“How are you doing?” hits differently when you’re grieving.
The Pain Isn’t Going Away, So I Might As Well Put It to Work
May 13, 2022
The reality is that burnout can take an awfully long time to recover from.
Gracious Polyamorous Relationship Systems Are the Ones That Thrive
May 12, 2022
I’ve seen amazing relationship systems, where people were happy, things were harmonious — and everyone in them suffered mostly from a kind of “pinch me” syndrome.
We’ve Been With So Many People Over the Years, Just Being Us
May 11, 2022
I get a little dizzy thinking about it sometimes. And proud of us. For the flexibility, for being kind during those dances even if we sometimes stepped on each other’s toes.
You Gave Me the World & Said It Was No Big Deal
May 10, 2022
You have no idea how wonderful you are. How much you help. You gave me the world and said it was no big deal.
Long-Term Happiness in Polyamory Is About Choosing the Hard Thing That Helps You Grow
May 9, 2022
Being successful at polyamory really is about choosing the hard thing that helps you grow.
I Wish I Could Explain What “Chemistry” Even Is
May 8, 2022
I’ll keep telling people I care about them, even if it sometimes results in a broken heart.
What’s “Obvious” About Us to Other People Is Often Hidden
May 7, 2022
We should be grateful for those moments when someone finally tells us the “obvious.” Whether it’s complimentary or not.
I Wish I Were One of Those People With Neat Handwriting
May 6, 2022
I was a strange little goblin growing up, and the adults were pessimistic about me from early on.
I Am Grateful for All the Past Heartbreaks That Taught Me to Appreciate This
May 5, 2022
I’m grateful for all the past heartbreaks that taught me to appreciate this. And all my partner’s heartbreaks that taught them to appreciate me.
Isolation Made Me Forget Who I Was
May 4, 2022
Isolation made me forget who I was, and it made me think people hate me.
He Had All the Time in the World to Tell Me Who I Should Be
May 3, 2022
“This is the way you’ll jump to the front of the line,” he said. And he spelled out a list of wants and needs — and wants disguised as needs.
Why I Rarely Split the Bill With Friends
May 2, 2022
My favorite thing about sharing is that when everyone takes turns doing it, life is truly wonderful.
You Have Ruined Me & It Makes Dating So Difficult
May 1, 2022
Most of what I find when I do the active online dating thing is transactional behavior and really boring conversations.
The One Thing I Can’t Stop Thinking About That Still Hurts Me
April 30, 2022
I’ve been holding on to something for a long time. A very long time.
